Vang Vieng

The minibus journey from Luang Prabang to Vang Vieng...

A tuk tuk turns up at our hostel and we're like ah bums, what have we paid for. Turns out it was just taking us to the bus station which was just full of minibuses getting ready to go to different places. The tuk tuk driver pointed us vaguely towards the Vang Vieng stand. I thank you. We get in the queue then 11 of us tumble into this minibus while 4 local guys try to fit all our backpacks into the boot. Eventually the people in the back row were fed up of getting their heads knocked about so they held the bags while the guys piled on the bags and sure enough the boot closed. Let's go!! Or not. We sit there for 20 minutes until eventually a woman opens the door and tells us that this bus doesn't leave til 2pm (its 10am) so we should move to the next one. Same same, no? No. So we all pile in the car and the bags get strapped up top. The driver jumps in, and then we're driving up and down MOUNTAINS for 7 hours.

The driver beeps his horn to warn oncoming traffic and then swings into a blind turn. The roads were windy so that's just how it works. Our driver was even overtaking lorries on these bends, it was crazy. The scenery was amazing though, and every now and then we would pass little roadside villages with their bamboo mountainside huts. There's lots of naked children playing around, and school kids, cows, chickens, dogs lying idly at the side of the road. Great. Our driver swerved them all without braking. The roads are bumpy too so don't party too hard the night before because you won't get any sleep. I tried, and it just caused my head to bash off the window... There was a row of Laotians in front of us and they managed to sleep no problem, no flopping heads, how?!?!

Anyways, after a few hours we stopped for a food break. Pete was convinced the woman who sold us our sandwich was the same woman from the bus station. I don't remember what either woman looked like but it wouldn't surprise me if they stopped at their pals roadside shop and ripped off the tourists together? We were charged double the guy in front because we asked for some Laughing Cow triangle cheese in our sandwich, c'mon!

The view during lunch...

We get into Vang Vieng at about 5pm. None of us knew where the bus station was in relation to the town so we had to pay 10,000 kip each (x8, the guy must have been laughing) to drive us 5 minutes down the road. Its only about 80p but the 0's make it feel like more, and yeah, just walk it... He dropped us at the hostels by the river but me and Pete chose to go the main road where it would be quieter because we wanted some rest before tubing the next day. We stayed at Nazim's Guesthouse, (next to one of the 2 ATM machines in town) 60, 000 kip for a double with a fan.

We dropped off our bags, relaxed for a bit then went out to find dinner. There's only about 3 main roads in this wee town and you find yourself picking a restaurant depending on how busy it is, and what's on the tele. The food is rubbish where ever you go. The restaurants all have the same layout- low tables and cushions so you can spend all day slouching, watching Friends or Family Guy. There won't be any restaurant reviews in this post but the pancakes from the street vendors are good!

Day 2, time for tubing. Yeahhh!

I was told not to take anything with me unless I wanted to lose it, even flip flops (slight exaggeration) but anyways we went out to buy some cheap ones which also doubled up as great wee paddles. We then had to go hire the tubes- it was 55,000 kip and a 60, 000 kip deposit which you get back as long as you return the tube by 6pm. They will also write your deposit number on your arm with a permanent marker. This can be likened to when a farmer brands their cows, or marks their sheep with red paint or something, you know the deal. Then they drive you up to the 'start' point of the river. Great. A man will appear out of the bushes offering you free Laos whiskey. Take a shot, and then walk across the bridge to the first bar. Dump your tube in the pile of other ones.

I can't describe how surreal an experience it is. Its just past noon, you're in beautiful Laos, next to a glistening river... and the music is pounding and everyone around you is drunk, already. Drinks are only served in buckets and there's free shots of whiskey waiting at every bar. Free. Help yourself. There's people swinging from rope swings like 3 storeys high. Its crazy. And then soon they will grab a rubber ring and float down to the next bar. Crazzyyyyy.

At the first bar we ended up playing beer pong with 2 guys who were doing promo for one of the bars, Gibson and Jasper (you couldn't make this shit up). They beat us by one cup but we were winning the whole time, hustlers. By the time we had finished most people had moved onto the next bar across the river. They had taken all the tubes with them though so we're like, now what? Gibson said no worries as long as you have been branded like a farm animal you'll get a tube so we waited for the next peeps to arrive at the bar then took their tubes and we were away... The waters cold, and the currents quite strong. At every bar there's a guy waiting with a plastic bottle attached to a rope which he'll throw out to pull you into the bar. Just hold on tight and soon you'll be at the next bar. Note- There's no graceful way of getting out of a tube. Drunk or not.

The second bar is the one with all the rambo head bands, permanent markers, stencils, spray paint and biggest rope swing in the world. I think within about 10 minutes of us getting there, Pete had a silver tie spray painted on his chest. Pete and I also plucked up the courage to do the rope swing (it doesn't take much). We went seperate so someone was keeping an eye on our money. I went up with one of the Irish guys we met, Gavin. Its SO high up. I got up there and he was like, 'on you go.' I was like, 'no no, you go first!' I've done this like tree times, you go, go on'. We ended up going together, I think he left just a little bit before me or his weight seemed to make things go faster. I didn't want to let go. He was like, 'after 3 we let go'. Ok, fuck, well there's no other way I'm going to get down. For some reason, I decided to flop into the water on the back of my leg. Just slap on down. I thought I had ripped it open. The current immediately pulls you so you have to start swimming straight away towards the bar. Ouch that's going to hurt in the morning.

There's only a wee stretch of bars and then you tube the rest of the way. We lost a lot of people either in front of us, or behind. Who knows. A lot of people just go to a few bars then catch a tuk tuk back to the town. We didn't get to do an extended amount of tubing because we had to jump out at one of the bars to rush back for our deposit....

Sooo. The next day we hired bikes and cycled out to the Blue Lagoon. The surroundings are beautiful. I took a waterproof camera so still waiting to see what the pictures turn out like. I met a group of 4 boys, probably no more than 4 years old and I asked them if it was okay to take a photo. Then one of them made like a writing motion on his hand. I was like, oh you want to write something. And then he looked in the basket at the front of my bike and pointed to my water bottle, I pointed back at his, and said, 'same same'. Pete was like, 'what are you doing?? He was looking through your stuff.' I only had water and a disposable camera so no biggie but on reflection- the little guy was asking for money! He was only like 4 years old. I just didn't expect it at all. I thought since they were little kids they wanted me to write my name or something haha. How naïve of me. I don't think I'd want to give kids that young money, and how much?

The Blue Lagoon is about 7km out of town and its beautiful, really relaxing. Get a map, and ignore all the signs on the way there claiming to be the Lagoon. The locals will charge you 10, 000 kip to cross the bridge once you get there but whatever. The water is cool and filled with fish, just what you need after a long cycle.

Went for a curry at Nazim's Indian Restaurant (not sure if it was affiliated with our guesthouse) that night. This food here wasn't great either. Within a few hours I was out of bed and being sick. Repeat ,all night. The next day I couldn't even keep water down so I was just in bed all day, DYING. Dehydrated, no energy because it left me the night before, legs I could barely move from the fall, arms sore from the swing. Deathbed.

Just do the tubing.